35 Reasons My Middle Schooler Might Be Freaking Out

Just this past week I stumbled across Jason Good’s 46 Reasons My Three-Year-Old Might Be Freaking Out.

  1. His socks are on wrong.
  2. His lip tastes salty.
  3. His shirt has a tag on it.
  4. The car seat is weird. . .
    (Read the rest of the list on Jason’s blog.)

The first thing I thought when I read the list was how much I wanted to share it with anyone I know who has a preschooler. Because let’s be honest, this is exactly what it’s like to live with a three-year-old.

The next thing I thought was (and I’m not sure why), “I wonder what this list sounds like for the parent of a middle schooler?” Since three-year-olds and eleven-year-olds have a few similarities, I texted a few of my friends who spend a lot of time around middle schoolers, Elle Campbell and Dan Scott, and we pulled together this follow up list.

35 Reasons My Middle Schooler Might Be Freaking Out

  1. I woke her up on time.
  2. Her school won’t let her wear leggings as pants.
  3. I drive a mini van.
  4. Zayn left One Direction.
  5. I don’t know which one Zayn is.
  6. I asked a question.
  7. I made her get out of the shower after 30 minutes.
  8. I didn’t know she doesn’t like pancakes anymore.
  9. I said I liked her hair today.
  10. “No one” noticed her hair today.
  11. Brian forgot their 3-week anniversary.
  12. Mitchell doesn’t wear socks.
  13. I volunteered to chaperone the class trip.
  14. I picked her up where her friends could see me.
  15. I confiscated her selfie stick.
  16. I posted a #TBT pic of our family
  17. Ben sat next to Sarah today.
  18. I don’t know who Ben or Sarah are.
  19. I asked about her day.
  20. I didn’t ask about her day.
  21. I am embarrassing.
  22. She and Kelly wore the same shirt today.
  23. There is (still) no taco emoji.
  24. Jason touched her hand—maybe on purpose.
  25. I offered to call Jason’s dad to find out.
  26. I wouldn’t let her eat 24 pizza rolls as a snack.
  27. I bought the wrong kind of energy drink.
  28. I got a Snapchat.
  29. I spoke.
  30. I wouldn’t let her be a “sexy” anything for Halloween.
  31. I didn’t think “everyone does it” was a good enough reason.
  32. They won’t let her take her phone on the fall retreat.
  33. Someone cropped her out of their Instagram photo.
  34. I took her phone and made her go outside.
  35. I am still embarrassing.
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Kristen Ivy

Executive Director of Messaging & Director of The Phase Project
Kristen earned her Bachelors of Education from Baylor University in 2004 and a Master of Divinity from Mercer University in 2009. Before beginning her career at Orange in 2006, she worked as a high school Biology and English teacher, where she learned firsthand the importance of influencing the next generation. Kristen and her husband Matt are currently parenting through the phases with a Kindergartener (Sawyer), a preschooler (Hensley), and her own “Zero to One” baby (Raleigh).


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